Sent out one of the longest emails I’ve ever written. To my theatre connection and support in the states. It included notes on the trilogy, and PDFs of the script. It’s not their submission period. I’m probably a bit out of line with even sending it. But…and…I just couldn’t let A put in a submission for Blue Whale yet again with this group without informing her of the entire work. So she’s got it, with full explanation and disclosure.
I’ll admit it… I hope I get an email along the lines of ‘I just couldn’t stop reading it. It’s fabulous!’ Truth is, I’m not sure I’ve got my point across in the three acts. I’m hoping people get it, but you know how that goes – people can be insanely dense sometimes. Guess I need a little outside assurance on the whole thing.
Still no whisper from the local director. He’s had the full monty since New Year’s. Hello? Do you like it? Hate it? Are you on vacation somewhere and haven’t even read it? No idea.
Thinking about writing. How often I’ve seen or heard that old (and arrogant) phrase meant to encourage newbies: writers write. What a load. I heard that at 20 and didn’t understand. I heard that at 30 and thought I was doing what I needed to do. I heard it at 40 and got fed up with everyone, told them to all go fuck themselves and they’d never read my stuff again. I think I’ve finally got it. When you get to the point where you can churn out 1000 words on nothing and make it interesting, you’re there. Then, all you need is a story. But if you sit in front of your computer thinking, not knowing what to write, not knowing how to start…get writing. Everything. Every day. Make your damned shopping list into something interesting for me to read. My advice: tackle the small form first. Hone your skills on short material. The longer stuff will write itself. The story will spin and weave at its own pace, and suddenly you’ll realize you’re onto something.
In other words, stop trying so hard. Stop trying to be interesting or original.
Gods, I wish I could say that to J about his writing! It is what I think he’s trying to do: be very original and create an entire world. Kudos. We all do it. But…it’s too much. *sigh* Still don’t have my notes written out for him. Still haven’t finished reading his story because that’s how little it interests me.
Ach, if I ever teach, fantasy writing will be banned. Nope. Write in black and white before you flesh in those chroma colored characters.
Small victories: no pain in my teeth. Yippee! Still brushing cautiously. Another day at the gym. Not so yippee. Had a back spasm near the end of my hour’s walking. Still having pain in my hip area. And really! I feel like I’m not even using the gym if my heart rate doesn’t go over 140. But I’m doing it. More Dutch films. Hearing more. More understanding is coming back to me, getting the gist of the spoken Dutch before reading the English subtitles. Good. Better. Should invest time in reading my Dutch book, but it IS officially still my holiday time…
Heaving a sigh of relief. Received a letter from the government about my bro’s company. My bro was in a dither, but trying really hard not to show it. I felt immediately it must be some sort of mix-up or crossed wires. We just got everything cleared. So my bro met with his native Dutch speaking friend, and popped downtown to talk to someone. Yes. It’s a mix-up. Some paperwork somewhere along the line didn’t get put through even tho it’s there. Whew! Did not need another 6 months of running around like mad eejits.
Purposefully avoiding a lot these days. The news. Climate change. Equality. Seems these topics are in my face 24/7. I expect a lot of people feel that way. Every day, there’s something new. The biggest storm. The stupidest tweet. More sexual allegations. When I couple the news with the knowledge that nothing is really changing yet, nothing seems to remove certain people from office no matter what they say or do, I lose heart. Totally. Always comes down to fantasies of me with a gun in my hand. Those are ugly thoughts, full of anger and rage. I guess a part of me feels that some people will never change, and the world really would be a better place if they were just dead. Doing my best to find understanding, but that’s damned difficult. It’s difficult because people always have a choice. They can be assholes or not. Simple as that. Everyone gets hurt. Everyone has issues. Some people think that gives them the right to shit on others. Those are the people who need to die off. Accidental shitting on someone, or doing it and then regretting it…I understand making mistakes. But setting off to destroy someone with your words, your lies? No. Kill them. And all their spawn, because they’ve taught that to every single one of their children.
Speaking of parents and children, been thinking about a very harsh punishment system. One that punishes the family of criminals. If you’ve raised a criminal or a psychopath, you should be responsible for what you did. Don’t sit there and looks stupid, or hold your hands up and say you don’t know what happened. You knew – or should have known – about this. You chose to have this person. You took responsibility for feeding it, giving it a place to sleep, teaching it your ethics. If your experiment created a psycho, you should pay. …Harsh, right? I know. That’s a reflection of my anger level.
…Put that aside now. It’s Saturday; time to clean. High time for a good scrub all around – including me. Scrape off the old, and lay bare the new.